Helping each other...

Here is a conversation you probably relate with:

To me from a very dear friend:
"I really wish you were closer so you could be my food accountability person...we should be each others. I feel like I have overcome A LOT of really bad habits from my childhood and feel like I am a healthy person... But sometimes something in me just screams for great food all the time. I can eat really healthy for a while and resist temptation to eat large portions or unhealthy foods. I will be praising myself on my self control. And then I will make caramel brownies for a bbq and eat 2 that night and 4 the next day. Seriously that is so bad. And then I am so mad at myself. And then I will get back on the horse for a week until someone brings me chocolate chip cookies. AHHH! It is weird because if I know I am going to be tempted I can adequately prepare myself (except for caramel brownies, or those really yummy things that you made at crystals last year) and I won't go crazy, but if someone surprises me with really great food and I wasn't preparing for the temptation it is really hard to resist. What is my deal! Also, I am a social eater. I can do really good when I am by myself, but get me into a social situation and everyone is eating all this good food, it is really hard for me to not partake. Do you ever feel that way, or am I crazy?"

My response:
"I've thought so much about your e-mail! I relate with a lot of what you said. The whole eating thing is so strangely difficult. I wonder how many eating disorders the Joseph Smith era had. I'm guessing not very many where it was not so readily at fingertips, not so sweet, and you had to work pretty darn hard to make any.

I read a few books recently and learned a few things. One was a new one by Jillian Michaels, the trainer to the Biggest Looser. It's like a 30 day program. She explained a lot in the first half of the book and I learned and loved it! She made me realize that when I make choices I can either feel calm or stressed, like pressure in my chest. I related right away because sometimes that happens, usually right before I dive into the carton of ice cream or the 5 cookies.

Another book was - the eat clean diet for families, by Reno Tusano or something. I really liked it! It's all about eating clean, which means you eat food in the form God created it.

From these two books I learned a lot about myself. When I eat good foods I feel good and am stronger at turning down foods that taste amazing, but they really affect my mood and my physical well being. Recently I learned a bit about sugar and it's really hit the spot. Right now if you handed me a caramel bar I would honestly turn it down because I don't want it... until a couple of weeks ago I would NEVER have done that, but eaten 1/4 of the pan.... Sugar is naturally found in some plants and it's combined w/fiber. Fiber slows down how fast the sugar is absorbed into the blood stream. Refined sugar (the take the sugar and extract the fiber) and similar products (white flour) are absorbed immediately into the blood stream. This gives a small, short lived burst of energy and then a big dip or low. You body doesn't like the low (plus it's a lot harder to be a good mom, make good decisions, and just feel happy) so it sends a message to the brain demanding another shot of sugar... over and over. After eating clean for a few days I could tell a HUGE difference in how stable my mood was, and I can really hear what cues my body gives. Just today I had a sugar cookie w/icing at Grandma's house. We were decorating sugar cookies and things were getting crazy, we were trying to finish and leave, and I let my guard down, and had a bite. For me I'm so good as long as I don't take a bit. If I'm really focused I can take a bite and walk away, but when there are distractions I just keep eating as a way to handle the stress. So, my the time we left I had eaten two small cookies... but I am so feeling the effects! Instant sugar rush and head ache.

These are my thoughts lately, "if I eat that it's just going to make me feel bad," "it's not worth the 3 seconds of pleasure." It's really hard for me to work through the after effects of the sugar rush or the emotional effect. Maybe if I wasn't in charge of three little people who jump up and down and need help all at the same time.

I'm learning though and I'm quick not to beat myself up if I slip. Like w/the cookies... I wish I hadn't, but I'm learning from this. Next time we're over there hopefully I'll at least be able to tell myself to keep my head when the craziness happens. It's always when the craziness is happening!"

Do you relate?
love, Caryn